FoleyFunctional

“You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America’s Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn’t want to
go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named ‘Bush’, ‘Dick’, and ‘Colon.’ Need I say more?”

Every town has the same two malls: the one white people go to and the one white people used to go to.

Rodney Dangerfield:

I’m at the age where I want two girls. In case I fall asleep they will have someone to talk to.

A girl phoned me and said, “Come on over. There’s nobody home.” I went over. Nobody was home!

Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.

Jay Leno:

The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot.

Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average. Which means you’ve met your New Year’s resolution.

The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn’t for any religious reasons. They couldn’t find three wise men and a virgin.

Here’s something to think about: How come you never see a headline like ‘Psychic Wins Lottery’?

Dennis Miller:

A recent police study found that you’re much more likely to get shot by a fat cop if you run.

The only way the French are going in is if we tell them we found truffles in Iraq.

Jon Stewart:

I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.

Steve Martin:

Boy, those French: They have a different word for everything!

There is one thing I would break up over, and that is if she caught me with another woman. I won’t stand for that.

I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.

First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.

George Carlin:

Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

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Dec 24

Simpsons Picture a Day Spoof

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For those fans of The Simpsons, you may have seen a recent episode where they spoof ‘Noah takes a photo of himself everyday for 6 years’. If you haven’t, naturally, a clip of The Simpsons spoof is on YouTube. In the end of the clip, it parodies You Tube’s related video by showing its own related videos.

On The Simpsons, a cat smoking on a toilet has 43 million views, and rated 5 stars. The Simpsons also makes fun of the fact that people post duplicate videos. (I HATE people that do that) by showing a relevant video as one that is exactly the same as the one showing now.

Well, the funny thing is that after I watched this clip on You Tube….my related videos were….

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Nov 09

X Me Application

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There’s a ‘X all your friends” option…It’s a bit scary!

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Oct 26

We didn’t start the viral

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A few of my close friends have the displeasure of knowing that “We didn’t start the fire” by Billy Joel is one of my favorite quirky songs I like listening to. For those that watch youtube videos and other random junk on the Internet, you will relate to this, whether or not you appreciate Billy Joel